Good jokes for online dating sites

A joke about a male bus passenger insulting a woman's ugly baby has been hailed in a survey as the funniest gag ever.Researchers scoured the web and examined more than 1,000 jokes before whittling them down to a final 50 on which 36,000 people voted.

"What's the best movie/book/meal you saw/read/ate in the past year?She says to a man next to her: 'The driver just insulted me! Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.'It also features risqué jokes about religion, anorexia - and animal cruelty. I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs. 'I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller", he said "Not you again".' 14. 'A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The bus driver says: 'Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!The study was carried out after a panel of eight comic critics voted the holiday joke by Tim Vine (brother of TV presenter Jeremy Vine) the best of this year's Edinburgh Fringe Festival. 'The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. 'A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. 'I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits? The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. ' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming.You accomplish this by creating a fun, enjoyable atmosphere that gets her excited to reply.To start, there’s one thing you should know that will greatly affect your response rates… I did a huge post about it and nearly all of the profiles I critique suffer from crappy photos. The guys don’t smile, are unkempt, and look like the dating site murderer (pictured above).

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